A moment in time

February 6th 2001

Dear Diary,

It's so unfair! Everyone else is going to this sleepover and I'm not allowed to go. This cute boy everyone likes is going, so why can't I go!? My parents still think I'm a child but I'm turning eight this July! That's only two measly numbers away from a double digit number!

This was a small section of a diary account I had written as an eight year old. Back then, I was still a little girl wanting to keep a journal of her life. Now, almost nine years later, I let every precious moment slip me by without a second thought. What I'm questioning myself now is; how many nine years do I still have left in my life? Another nine years speed by, I'm working. Another nine years pass by, I'm getting married. What's next? Retirement? A primary reason I am aiming to constantly update this blog is because it lets me speak for the present. The present however, only lasts if you never look back. But I want to look back, to reminiscence on all of the thoughts and memories I had once taken for granted.

I was naive to once think love as an eight year old could last forever, or that not going to a silly sleepover was the end of the world. Looking back, I'm glad I made some of the mistakes I had made as a child. It's ultimately your recovery from a fall that defines the person you will someday become. I've on no account been as apprehensive about the future as I am now. I'm scared I'll miss the moments which can alter my life for the better. I don't want to look back someday and see a life full of mistakes, regrets.

I've always been a fair judge of character but I've never ventured below the surface to really understand somebody. I've been afraid to do so incase when I truly understand somebody, I'd see them differently. But on the other hand, I'd be more empathetic towards people with different views to me. It's difficult to say how long a journey I have left to travel or what kind of people I'll meet along the way. I've encountered many interesting and wonderful personas during the sixteen years I've been in this world. They've helped me to see the world in a different light. I know they won't stay forever, but each person owns a moment of my life.